Your Team’s Not Broken, Your Definition of Professionalism Might Be: Questions to Ask As a Manager of a Neurodiverse Team

You’ve got a team full of smart, capable people—but somehow, things still feel off. Deadlines are missed, communication feels clunky, and that one employee keeps asking if they really have to come to the team-building escape room. If you’re managing neurodivergent folks (and statistically, you are), these aren’t signs of dysfunction—they’re signs that your workplace norms might need a tune-up.

Here are some thought provoking questions to get yourself thinking about how the way you approach management could be improved to be more neuro-inclusive.

🧠 Foundational Understanding & Reflection

1. What assumptions do you think people often make about neurodivergence in the workplace? Have you ever noticed any of these in yourself or your organization?

2. What do you already know (or think you know) about supporting neurodivergent team members? Where did that knowledge come from?

3. What does "performance" mean to you, and how might that definition be shaped by neurotypical norms?

4. How comfortable do you feel initiating accommodations conversations? What holds you back (if anything)?

🔍 Scenario-Based Discussion Starters

1. You notice that an employee on your team avoids eye contact, rarely speaks in meetings, and often sends thorough follow-ups afterward. A senior leader comments that they seem disengaged. What do you do?

2. A high-performing team member consistently misses deadlines but produces excellent, thoughtful work. You suspect executive functioning challenges may be involved. How do you approach a conversation?

3. During a team meeting, a neurodivergent employee shares that open-plan offices make it difficult for them to focus. Other team members roll their eyes. What’s your next move?

4. You’ve introduced a new policy requiring cameras on in virtual meetings. A neurodivergent employee pushes back. How do you respond—and how do you revisit the policy?

5. An employee discloses they’re autistic and requests more structure in feedback and performance reviews. Your current process is informal. What changes might you consider?

🛠 Strategy & Practice

1. What’s one way you could build more predictability or clarity into your team’s workflows without singling anyone out?

2. How can you balance individual flexibility with team cohesion in a way that respects neurodivergent needs?

3. What kinds of communication norms might create more safety and clarity for neurodivergent people on your team?

4. If you were redesigning performance reviews with neurodivergent inclusion in mind, what would you change?

5. How do you ensure accountability without relying on punitive or ableist systems?

🧩 Identity, Power & Bias

1. How might your own neurotype or communication style shape the way you give and receive feedback?

2. What kinds of behavior get labeled as "unprofessional," and who decides what’s professional?

3. What’s the risk of equating “culture fit” with “neurotypical comfort”? What might it look like to prioritize culture add instead?

4. Have you ever pathologized or dismissed behavior that was unfamiliar to you? What did you learn from that experience?

If you're unsure how you would answer some of these questions or navigate these scenarios, book a coaching session with me!